mixed-up-word worries

名称：mixed-up-word worries
内容简介：
Dear Arizona,
　 People make fun of me because I'm always getting words mixed up. Sometimes I get so embarrassed that I never want to open my mouth again. Do you have any suggestions?
　 — Embarrassed in Evanston



Dear Embarrassed,
　 Join the mixed-up-word club! If they handed out awards for Most Embarrassing Word Mix-Ups, you'd have to compete against me for the gold medal!

Here’s something I said to my little brother just last week: “Hey, Tex, don’t forget to put the refrigerator back in the milk carton when you’re done.”

Tex started giggling uncontrollably. “Don’t you think it would be hard to fit our great big fridge into this tiny milk carton?”

OK, that incident really wasn’t all that embarrassing, and I ended up laughing right along with him.

A slightly more embarrassing moment was a couple of days later in class, when we each had to say which national monument we’d chosen for our report. In front of everyone, I said that I’d be writing about “the Statue of Library” when I meant the Statue of Liberty!

“Libraries are incredibly important,” my friend Mareya said afterward, trying to make me feel better.

But the most embarrassing word mix-up happened over the weekend. I was walking Charlie, my neighbor Rosy’s dog, and we passed my friend Ollie’s house on the way to the park.

Ollie was in his garage putting sports gear into boxes.

“Hi, Ollie!” I called. But he didn’t answer.

“Yoo-hoo, Ollie!” I called again, louder.

When he didn’t answer, I realized it was because he was wearing headphones, so I walked right up to him.

“Oh, hey!” he said as Charlie jumped up to greet him.


“I’m walking Charlie to the park for Rosy. Want to come with us?”

“No, thanks,” said Ollie. “I’m almost done organizing.”

“That’s cool,” I said. “By the way, the music you’re listening to must be either really loud or really good, because I was trying forever to get your attention.”

“Not really loud, because I don’t want to blast out my eardrums,” he said, “but definitely good. Here, listen for yourself.”

I put the earphones on. “This is good!”

“Take it on your walk,” Ollie suggested.

“Wow, thanks!” I said. “I’ll return it on my way back.”

In case you’re wondering what was embarrassing about any of that, the answer is—nothing! But it led to the very embarrassing part of my day.

As Charlie and I strolled along, I was feeling extra energized by Ollie’s music. I thought I was singing along only in my head—but it turned out that I was singing loud and clear for the whole world to hear!

“‘New magazine, yeah, new magazine! You tear yourself apart, oh oh! New magazine!’”

As the song ended, I heard loud laughter behind me.

“She can’t seriously think it’s ‘new magazine’!” said one voice.

“As if anyone would write a song like that,” said another.

I glanced back and saw two girls about my age. My first thought was Where can I find a rock to hide under for the rest of my life? My second thought was Somebody should tell those girls that they’re not being very nice!

But I decided to pretend I hadn’t heard them and went straight back to Ollie’s house.

“Thanks for letting me borrow this,” I said, handing him his MP3 player. “But I don’t think I want to hear that song again for as long as I live!”

When I told him what had happened, he sang the lyrics for me, and it turned out that the part I thought was “New magazine” was actually “You make a scene”!

Ollie helped convince me that it was a waste of time to worry about what those girls thought. Besides, my version is more fun to sing! In fact, when the song comes on now, Ollie and I completely crack up as we sing our version of it: “‘New magazine, yeah, new magazine! You tear yourself apart, oh oh! New magazine!’”

So, dear Embarrassed, I guess what I’ve learned is that there are so many thousands of words in the English language that it would be impossible not to get a few mixed up once in a while. Also, there’s no point in letting rude people get you down. The next time an embarrassing thing like that happens to me, I won’t waste time feeling terrible. I’ll find a friend and laugh about it!

Ciao for now,

Arizona